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Post by bella on Mar 4, 2011 0:13:21 GMT -5
This whole acting human thing was getting a little out of hand. Bella didn’t want to be human any longer than she had to. She found herself actually wanting the wedding day to be closer, even though she really didn’t want to go through with the whole ceremony, just so it would all be over and Edward could keep his part of their little bargain. The charade was getting to the point where Bella had almost had enough. She didn’t want to live like this anymore. She hated feeling like she was risking everyone’s lives to be human and she hated growing older every day. She hated that things were so difficult with Jacob right now and she hated that it hurt Edward to know that she loved the werewolf even if it wasn’t as much as she loved Edward. It was tearing her and everyone she cared about apart for her to stay human this long. She was going to have to say goodbye to everyone at the wedding, wasn’t this just making things harder?
In any case, she was human still for at least a couple months and Edward was determined that they were going to be as much of a human couple as possible. She didn’t point out to him that usually, human couples could touch each other without fear of breaking them. Normal couples didn’t get into as much supernatural trouble as they did. They weren’t a normal human couple because they weren’t normal. That was just fine with Bella, the probably was that it didn’t seem to be just fine for Edward.
She had to admit though, that if they were going to be normal, and do normal things, this was a nice place to be normal at. They drove to the docks, apparently neutral territory for the Cullens and wolves, and Bella sat on one of the outstretched docks with her bare feet dangling in the water, though it was still a bit chilly for summer. She’d dressed in a yellow tank-top under a white shirt, with a pair of Capri jeans and orange and brown flip flops that matched nothing she was wearing, which was how she liked it. She wasn’t looking forward to days were Alice would be putting her in dresses just because she could. She loved her soon to be sister-in-law but sometimes she thought Alice went a little overboard out of boredom.
Bella kicked her feet back and forth. It was a cloudy day, as usual, so it was fine to not be indoors or in the meadow. And really, Bella liked the docks. She liked the water (when she wasn’t drowning in it) and she liked watching the boats come in and out. But mostly, she liked that Edward was there with her. She felt safe with him around, like nothing could happen to her, though that wasn’t entirely true. She couldn’t blame him for any of that, she was just clumsy - had been her entire life. That was something not a lot of supernatural people seemed to really understand, or if they did, they found it funny. Ha ha, Bella tripped again, or Bella needs more stitches, or Bella should be put in a bubble.
As she thought, Bella glanced at her ring. In a few months, she’d be Bella Cullen, not swan. And she’d be a vampire, and she wouldn’t have to slow Edward or any of his family down. But she might lose Jacob, and most of her pack friends. Maybe not Seth, he seemed to like the vegetarian vampires almost as much as Bella did. Maybe Seth would be enough. Maybe she could stay connected with Jake through Seth. Maybe not. She didn’t want to cause Edward anymore pain than she already had.
“My truck finally broke down, so I guess you get to buy a car like you wanted.” She had meant for her voice to sound more enthusiastic. Instead, it came out sort of deflated. A new car wasn’t exactly something Bella wanted, but she’d agreed to this condition. She was sure it would be something flashy and durable, something that would draw attention to her.
tag: edward! words:695 outfit: Bella doesn't care about matching |
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Post by amber on Mar 12, 2011 17:30:17 GMT -5
 
Of all the places that his Bella wanted to visit, the docks was one that he hadn't thought of. It wasn't that Edward didn't like the water, he loved sitting by the edge of a river or lake and listening to the water lap against the sand., he just didn't think it held the same affect for humans. For him he could hear the fish and creatures moving around under the water, hear every subtle nuance of that other world. It was nice to be out here, where he didn't have to deal with hearing voices in his head.
So he followed his girl out here, and from a distance watched as she seemed to relax against the wooden dock. Taking a seat next to her, close enough to barely touch her but far enough away that she wouldn't feel unsafe, Edward sighed softly. So many thoughts were running through his head and he hated trying to sort them out. He wished perhaps that he could hear Bella's thoughts, at least then he'd know for certain just how she felt about him. Never before had he been forced to guess and judge based off of facial expressions and nonverbal communication. Not that he couldn't it was just easier to be able to test if someone was lying by listening into their thoughts. It also made it easier to keep himself safe.
Yet here he was sitting next to the one human who loved him and he had no idea if it was true. A large parted of him hoped that even after she was turned she would retain her feelings for him, yet a bigger part seemed to doubt that he was going to be happy forever. He had almost allowed himself to get lost in his head when he heard Bella's voice speak. "Don't sound so excited there Bella. You act like I planned to make your truck break down. It was old and not very safe for your to begin with." His tone was a bit amused but frustrated at the same time.
Why couldn't Bella understand that all he wanted for her was to be safe while she was human? Every day it seemed as if something was trying to hurt her and she seemed to balk at that idea. "Is it so hard to think I want you to be safe?" The last part was said lowly enough to sound like a whisper to Bella. It stung, he knew, that she seemed to take her frustrations out on him but Edward would get over it. He loved Bella enough to put up with her emotions. Reaching out gently, he rested an arm around her shoulders as he stared out at the blue water around the dock.
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Post by bella on Mar 14, 2011 14:24:59 GMT -5
  Time passed all too quickly with Edward around, though Bella wasn’t about to point that out because she caused the vampire too much pain as it was already and adding just one more thing to his list of things that upset her was just not something Bella was going to do. Besides, soon Bella wouldn’t have to worry about time; she’d have all the time she needed, all the time in the world. She was going to be a vampire like him and the rest of the Cullens. Maybe she’d even be a bit better at it than Bree seemed to be doing. Of course, for the first year of her life Bree had fed only on human blood, and that would be different for Bella, she told herself. And the point of all this talking with Carlisle, Jasper, and Emmett about the newborn life was to see if it would make a difference in her afterlife. Bella had to believe that would work, because if it didn’t, it meant she would be even more of a danger to Charlie and they’d have to move her far away from the pack so she wouldn’t put the Cullens at risk of exposure.
She kicked her feet just a little to watch the water move, noticing the clear distance between herself and Edward, something else that upset her. Edward was oddly traditional for a vampire and Bella had to keep telling herself that he was doing a few things by this no touching business: protecting her virtue (though Bella had told herself that since she didn’t believe Edward was damned, she was protecting his); keeping Bella safe since he could be absolutely lethal; and making sure Bella went through with her word on the whole marriage thing. That last thought had Bella looking down at the ring on her left hand. Marriage wasn’t something Bella was all too happy about, but if it got her what she wanted, she wasn’t going to complain. After all, she had been the one wanting to compromise on this, she’d just thought that her desire would have come a bit sooner than a huge party which required a clumsy human walking down an aisle.
Edward’s words made her sigh; she’d done it again. Hurt him somehow. She kept telling herself she’d never do that, but it kept happening anyway. This time, she supposed it was her sarcasm that had done it. Edward was forever trying to spoil Bella and all she wanted was to just be close to him. She didn’t care about brand name clothing, fancy jewelry, or shiny modes of transportation. What she wanted was to start living her life with the vampire she loved. Of course, there was a small part of her that wanted to live her life with a werewolf, but she knew that part well enough to keep it quiet and hope that it just went away after she was married. If Jacob hadn’t kissed her last month right before the new born attack, Bella would be completely (or as complete as she could get with an upcoming marriage) happy.
“I didn’t mean it like that, Edward.” Bella glanced up at her vampire boyfriend, hoping to make everything better again. “I’m just used to my truck, that’s all. But I promised you could get me a car when it died, and it definitely died, so I thought I’d let you know.” The human angled her body so she was facing her vampire more directly than just sitting side by side. She pulled her feet out of the water and sat cross-legged, close enough to him that their bodies touched more than they had just minutes ago. “Of course I know you want to keep me safe.” She smiled, though it wasn’t easy, she didn’t think she was all that fragile. Bella looked down at her hands, folded in her lap. “After the wedding, everything will be better,” she said, mostly promising herself than anything else.
tag: edward! words: 665 outfit: click menotes: prettyish credit: made by ELLIE of lastSUNRISE;; quote == bella swan |
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